Nov. 21--CARLSBAD -- The local Alzheimer's Support Group provides the strength and hope caregivers need to continue to provide their family member with love and care as a very difficult disease progresses.

The support group is for individuals community-wide who are providing care or dealing with someone who has Alzheimer's or other related dementias. The group utilizes a teaching format regarding the disease and caregiver issues, as well as group sharing of common experiences.

The group meets at 2 p.m. the second Wednesday of the month at the Landsun Clubhouse, 1211 Landsun Circle.

"Often times, the caregiver faces the decision to ask for assistance of professionals either in their home or through placement in a long term facility," said Barb Kouba, Landsun director of social services and support group co-facilitator with Larry Krueger.

"The support group often provides the needed support through the decision process by sharing their story and coming to terms that the caregiver job becomes too big for one person when the care needs increase," Kouba added.

Kouba explained they use an open group format and strive to keep the meeting to an hour because most caregivers are worried about returning to their loved one.

"We talk about the caregiver's world and how important it is for them to take care of themselves," Kouba said.

Pat Matthews' husband had a stroke 10 years ago and suffers from vascular dementia. He's physically healthy as a horse but his mental facilities

diminish day by day.

"He was an electrician and he gets so depressed and says, 'I can't do anything anymore,'" Matthews said.

His ability to tell time from a clock is gone, so everything in their home is digital.

"You have to anticipate it's going to get worse. I get worried to leave him because he may tear something up. He's in the fix-it stage," added Matthews.

Kouba explained that the ability to sequence (action of following in order) goes away. When a pattern continues and impedes the ability, more than likely something is wrong. Later down the road as the disease progresses, people look back and can see the pattern.

"It (disease) runs the gamut of 10 to 20 years," Kouba said. "It's a continual process that goes on for years. The earlier the onset, the quicker it goes."

"People are sensitive and they are very aware that something is wrong," Matthews said. "He's turned into a recluse. He used to love to go out, but he doesn't want people to see him."

"It shows the big change in a caregiver's life also," Kouba said.

"The hard part is having to make all the decisions," said Matthews. "At this point, I know it's lonely for him."

Matthews explained the calendar confuses her husband, his communication has narrowed and his one focus today is doing the yard. She can still leave him for short periods at the present. She does fear the time she can't leave him because of what he will do.

The worst fear is the day they no longer recognize anyone, explained Kouba.

"Line dancing is still my one outlet," Matthews said.

"Instead of trying to change the person, you change the situation," Kouba said. "When they lose the ability to live in our world, we join them in theirs.

"The support group brings a sense of hope that we can do this. The group is open to anyone, caregiver or family members," added Kouba.

"I've met nice people and talked to several at the group," Matthews said. "It helps to find you're not the only one."

For more information about the Alzheimer's Support Group, call 885-8150 and ask for Barb Kouba.

10 signs of Alzheimer's

1. Memory loss that disrupts daily life

2. Challenges in planning or solving problems

3. Difficulty completing familiar tasks at home, at work or at leisure

4. Confusion with time or place

5. Trouble understanding visual images and spatial relationships

6. New problems with words in speaking and writing

7. Misplacing things and losing the ability to retrace steps

8. Decreased or poor judgment

9. Withdrawal from work or social activities

10. Changes in mood and personality

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